Comedian's WILDEST Christmas Stories

Join us as we delve into the lighter side of the holiday season through the lens of comedy. From the quirky holiday experiences of popular stand-up comedians to the humorous banter of comedy podcast hosts, we've compiled a series of clips and stories that offer a unique and chuckle-inducing perspective on Christmas traditions and mishaps. Whether it's the amusing tale of Mark Normand's stolen Christmas bike, the comedic musings of Bert Kreischer about fooling his kids with Santa footage, or the hilarious discussions on the 'Your Mom's House' and 'Tuesdays With Stories' podcasts about the challenges of gift-giving and the high cost of Christmas trees in Manhattan, these narratives showcase the humor that often accompanies the festive season.

Bad Friends

In this clip of the Bad Friends comedy podcast, hosted by renowned stand-up comedians Andrew Santino and Bobby Lee, the duo dives into their annual Secret Santa. The clip starts with a bewildered Santino discovering that Lee, in a classic display of forgetfulness, has failed to bring a gift for the Secret Santa exchange. Santino, clearly taken aback, questions Lee about his lack of preparation, highlighting that the names were picked live on air the previous week. Lee's response is a mix of confusion and feigned ignorance, claiming no one informed him about the Secret Santa, despite Santino having evidence to the contrary. In an amusing twist, Lee suddenly remembers that he did, in fact, get a gift for Santino, leading to a humorous exchange where he pretends to have delivered it to George's (a staff member) house to keep it a secret. The situation escalates comically as Santino becomes increasingly skeptical of Lee's story, questioning him relentlessly. Lee's attempts to deflect and create a believable narrative are met with playful annoyance from Santino. Lee's forgetfulness and Santino's reactions encapsulate the spontaneous and unpredictable nature of the show, providing listeners with a delightful and laughter-filled experience.

Your Mom's House

Next, we look at a clip from the Your Mom's House comedy podcast, hosted by stand-up comedians Tom Segura and Christina P, where the conversation revolves around the perennial challenge of selecting the right Christmas gifts. The clip humorously delves into the dynamics between the couple and their views on gift-giving, especially during the festive season.

Tom and Christina discuss their mutual agreement not to exchange Christmas gifts, a decision stemming from past experiences where expectations and reality often mismatched. Christina humorously recounts her frustrations with buying gifts for Tom, who tends to respond with lukewarm-at-best enthusiasm, questioning whether the problem lies with her gift selection or his reactions. This leads to a broader discussion about the difficulties in choosing gifts for someone who seemingly has everything or does not show much interest in material possessions. The conversation takes a comedic turn when Christina admits that she is, in fact, a skilled gift-giver who enjoys the entire process, contrasting with Tom's apparent lack of interest in receiving gifts. This difference in their approach to gift-giving is highlighted when Tom expresses his desire for practical gifts like an iPad, to which Christina humorously suggests that he might as well buy it himself.

Adding to the humor, Christina shares insights into her upbringing, attributing her casual attitude towards material gifts to her parents' communist background. She hilariously recalls receiving practical items like ground beef as gifts, emphasizing her parents' belief that material possessions were not as important as other values. Throughout the clip, Tom and Christina's banter exemplifies their comedic chemistry, offering listeners a glimpse into their personal lives and the relatable challenges of gift-giving in relationships. Their playful and candid conversation resonates with many who find themselves in similar dilemmas during the holiday season, making the segment both entertaining and relatable.

Mark Normand

In this Clip, comedian Mark Normand shares an unfortunate Christmas story that blends humor with a touch of pathos. He recalls a Christmas Eve during his childhood when his father gifted him a new bike, adorned with a festive bow, only for it to be stolen that very night. The irony of the situation is not lost on Normand, who humorously notes that the decorative bow did little to deter the thieves.

The story takes a more poignant turn when Normand describes seeing local kids riding by on his new bike the next morning, still with the bow attached. This moment encapsulates the frustration and helplessness he felt, as the thieves brazenly flaunted their theft without any fear of repercussions. Normand's depiction of this incident is a masterful blend of humor and heartache, illustrating the harsh realities of childhood in a light-hearted yet impactful way.

This Past Weekend

In this snippet from the 'This Past Weekend' comedy podcast, host Theo Von offers a slice of his unconventional humor, delving into a quirky holiday experience. He candidly shares a memory that is both peculiar and humorously intimate, describing a moment where he watched a woman breastfeed while listening to the song "Hallelujah." Theo's description of the scene is unique, blending a sense of awe with a touch of irreverence.

He humorously suggests that there is something almost biblical and decidedly Christmasy about the experience, likening it to a serene, sacred moment. Theo's ability to draw humor from such an unexpected and personal memory showcases his talent for finding comedy in the nuances of everyday life. His light-hearted and somewhat unorthodox storytelling captivates listeners, providing a glimpse into his distinctive perspective on life's odd and often overlooked moments.

Tuesdays With Stories

In an episode of the Tuesdays With Stories comedy podcast, stand-up comedians Mark Normand and Joe List engage in a humorous dialogue about the exorbitant cost of live Christmas trees in Manhattan. The conversation opens with the duo recounting their recent experiences purchasing Christmas trees, setting the stage for a comedic exploration of the surprising expense involved.

Joe describes his shock at the prices, likening the experience to an over-the-top financial exploitation, humorously exaggerated with vivid imagery. He delves into the logistics of tree transportation in Manhattan, where trees are imported from distant places like Quebec, leading to what he perceives as inflated international prices. List recalls expecting to spend a modest amount, only to find himself paying a staggering $120 for a tree, an amount he finds absurd for something so natural and earth-derived.

Mark shares his own experience, contrasting with Normand's by purchasing a smaller tree for $60. He humorously describes his mini tree as the "Brad Williams," referencing its diminutive size. He also narrates the struggle of decorating the tiny tree, with branches too weak to support the lights, adding a layer of comical frustration to the ordeal.

The podcast then meanders through various tangents, from the amusing process of purchasing the tree to random encounters with acquaintances during the buying process. Normand and List reflect humorously on the changing times, noting how prices have skyrocketed since their childhoods. The mention of gas prices leads to a witty exchange about economic inflation and the relative value of goods.

Bert Kreischer

Comedian Bert Kreischer recounts a hilarious and inventive Christmas story involving his children and a GoPro camera. The story begins with his kids growing suspicious about the existence of Santa Claus and deciding to set up a GoPro on the mantle to capture footage of Santa delivering gifts. Kreischer humorously notes his children's naivety, as they fail to properly prepare the camera with a sufficient memory card or external battery.

Embracing the challenge, Kreischer decides to play along with their plan, suggesting they equip the GoPro adequately to record all night. His children's suspicion shifts to him and their mother, leading to a comical exchange about the authenticity of Santa. Later that night, after the family has gone to bed, Kreischer enacts a clever plan to create a magical Santa moment. He sneaks into the room with bells, a white mitten, and a flashlight, creating a scene that would suggest Santa's visit. He strategically moves the flashlight and manipulates the GoPro to make it seem as if Santa was there.

The story climaxes at Christmas dinner when the children eagerly ask to see the GoPro footage, hoping to have captured Santa. Kreischer, having edited the video to splice out his appearance, shows only darkness and then sudden movement, with the flashlight inadvertently casting a shadow that, as luck would have it, looks like an elf. This convinces the children, and even his father, that they captured footage of Santa’s elf. Kreischer's father, upon realizing the trick, humorously comments on the impact of such antics on the children's beliefs.

Kreischer's storytelling is filled with humor, creativity, and a touch of mischief. He masterfully blends the excitement of childhood Christmas magic with the playful deceptions parents undertake to preserve it. His narrative is a testament to his ability as a comedian to turn family experiences into engaging and humorous tales.